Death on a Factory Farm

A couple days ago I finally found the energy to sit down and watch the HBO Documentary, Death on a Factory Farm, which originally aired on March 16, 2009. The film follows an undercover investigator with the alias "Pete," as he seeks to procure video and audio evidence of animal cruelty at the Wiles Hog Farm in Creston, Ohio. Tipped off by an employee at the farm, the Humane Farming Association hired Pete to gather enough evidence to allow the organization to file a complaint with local law enforcement and a lawsuit. Pete gets hired on the farm as a farm-hand and begins his surveillance. 

Over the course of six weeks, he obtains horrifying video evidence of animal cruelty to the animals on the farm by several employees, including the owners son, who runs the daily operations of the farm. From slamming piglets against the wall and dumping them in buckets, bleeding and still alive, to hanging downer sows with a chain using a forklift to raise them up and hold the squirming animals until they die, the Wiles Hog Farm is chock-full of the type of 'evidence' HFA wants for its prosecution. The film does a great job of limiting the graphic video of cruelty so that even a viewer who is unable or unwilling to watch such acts are able to sit through the entire film. This is important, because turning the movie off halfway would be a grave mistake.

The majority of the film is not video of animal cruelty, it is the story of the investigation and subsequent trial against the Wiles Hog Farm, giving the viewer insight into the way the farmers, the animal rights group, the community, and the law view the issues. Scenes from the actual trial give a real-life feel to the film where many documentaries fall short. The film is eye-opening (or closing, if you dont want to watch a piglet swung like a baseball bat against the wall) and provocative, in the way only a documentary of this kind can be.

This is a film that needs to be widely screened. As the filmmakers point out, animal rights is like the present-day civil rights movement. Our collective ignorance about the way our meat is raised, treated, slaughtered, packaged, and sold is an unsustainable way of living. We get squeamish when we see animals mistreated, so we choose to ignore that it happens and continue to make choices that perpetuate the mistreatment. From hogs, chickens, and cows to salmon, tuna, and sharks, our unchecked appetite for meat and seafood, fueled by agricultural, oil and gas, and pharmaceutical industries, creates the perfect recipe for cruelty, the likes of which are described in Death on a Factory Farm.

Please let me know if you would like a copy of the film, I would be more than happy to give one to you.

keep it fresh...

- Neil

Refresh

Yesterday, I found myself re-reading some of the early posts on this blog and truly enjoying being reminded of the memories I blogged about. Today, I find myself re-energized about the idea of maintaining a place to store my thoughts and experiences so that I can one day re-read this post and remember the feelings and environment at this exact moment.

Ten weeks into the summer, I feel consistently overwhelmed with what lies ahead of me, to the point that I physically and mentally cannot relax, even on weekends. This is new. I have never had a problem dropping whatever was on my mind and taking half a day or a few hours to be mindless, and relaxed. In the past, television, music, video-games, sports, and sleep were some of the ways I was able to accomplish mindlessness. For whatever reason, video-games do not appeal to me anymore; I get bored. Television and music can distract me for a while, but I'm never fully disengaged from what is on my mind at the time and so I sit there staring at the tv, but thinking about work that I have to do. Sports and sleep, are still the best ways for me to escape, but I exercise much less than I did before (a result of more work/anxiety), and I resist sleeping because once I'm out, I'm out.

So, this feeling of dread that I just can't shake prevents me from feeling happy a lot of the time. I think it's important to distinguish contentment from happiness. To me, being content involves gratitude, perspective, and satisfaction (in that order). Happiness, on the other hand, can be temporary and involves one's state of being for a given time. Of course, it need not be temporary. For me, contentment is not something I struggle with so much, but happiness has been hard to find lately. I am going to try and list the issues that I find myself constantly wrestling with.

1. Confidence. I've been rattled over the past year or so. Silently and gradually, I've come to trust myself less and feel unsure in my decisions. It just crept up on me. What do I want to do now that I'm at this point in law school?
Sometimes I feel like I want to discontinue down this road and explore a lifestyle that would seemingly be completely different. I imagine moving to a farm, learning how to grow plants, food, raise animals, and becoming closer to the people that I live/work with, the land I live on, the Earth that sustains me. I know that a choice like that isn't one that would be popular with some of the people that I care about. I don't know that I want to give up the relationships I have and the lifestyle I have to do that (though I'm tired of living a city-life most of the time).
In the case I stay in law school, what kind of work do I want to do? I know the direct answer to that question, but putting that into practice is much more delicate and complex. How do I balance the advice I get from attorney's, counselors, and peers with my gut feeling? I tell myself that I want to go down a certain path, but I am afraid to take the first step. Firm v. Non-profit v. Government v. ????. Are there any other options? After working at a firm this summer, I know that I don't want that job. But do I participate in OCI anyway? How much time do I allocate to each of the commitments I've made to different organizations?

...Not all of these question's have discrete answers, but I know that at the root of this struggle is a lack of confidence in myself and my world view. I'm not sure that I'm right.

2. Discipline. 24 hours sure hasn't seemed like enough time lately. There are always a million things to do, right? I want to get to that day where there I have accomplished all my work and have tomorrow to look forward to because there is nothing that I have left over from today. Before I get there though, I've got to put up the art that has been sitting in my apartment for months, organize my desk in a way that I want to have it permanently, use the storage drawers that I recently bought for some of my files, update my filing system with paperwork, move my music from one computer to the other, fix some of the things that need fixing at the apartment, clean my car, fit the cleaning of the apartment into a schedule of some sort...the list only grows.

I guess most of my struggle is the general struggle of a particular human in a particular culture in a particular city at a particular stage with a particular world view.

Its ironic that sitting here for 30 minutes writing about my struggles has been very relaxing. I guess, that maybe shouldn't be so much of a surprise to me. Thank you. Im not sure who, but thank you. Now I'm off to cross off a few of those things on the list.

keep it fresh...

- Neil